Snake oil

I've got one thing to say! Jess is way better than I am.
I was recently telling my friend Judy how Jessica told everyone in Florida that she did not want me to meet the parents of one of our "new" friends. "Why", "How come", "What for"? they all ask. Jess looks at them with as if she is saying: "HELLO.......Have you never MET Knowlton - SHE IS A PARENT PLEASER"!!! She tricks everyone into believing she is perfect". So of course no one believed her and I was joking about this to Judy Cutler.
Judy - however - knows me exceptionally well.
"Oh yeah; YOU could be a snake oil SALESMAN!!" So there you have it - Jess is a real person - what you see is how she really is with you - that is very honorable.
I, on the other hand, well - I will just say you have NO clue what is happening behing my facade. Lester was even cracking up when Jess was talking about me in Florida. Yet, he did not want to say it outloud - in case I came back to get him....
And I would never have divulged this - except my friend Jess has really gotten some undue crap for her behaviour lately - and of course......I haven't!!